Paris awaits...

I have a love-hate relationship with the french language. Never in my life have I tried to learn something that has always seemed just out of reach.  It doesn't' matter how much I study, or how much progress I make I always feel like I'm a step behind; a step behind the others in my class, a step behind the text book since I start understanding Chapter 1 somewhere in the middle of studying Chapter 2, and a step behind my thoughts-barely unable to express even the most simple ideas even though I know I've studied all the necessary concepts. I have often been found driving to Provo gearing up for another morning of class wondering if my self esteem is up to another battering.

On the other hand, it is a beautiful language, and even a barely successful experience in studying  it has been important.  I was telling some good friends the other night that I will never be impatient with those I meet who come to Salt Lake looking for a different life and have the courage to take jobs that put them in front of those of us who have been speaking English all our lives. I honestly cannot imagine how frightening that would be.  I don't think I've ever been a very mean person, but now when I encounter these people, where ever it is,  I am always filled with a true sense of respect, and a wish that there was a way to honor them for their courage. For that insight alone, I will always be grateful.

I have also, obviously, gained a greater appreciation for my children, my husband, my siblings, my nieces and nephews, and all their friends who have jetted off to foreign worlds, either as missionaries or just adventure seekers and have fearlessly embraced new languages and cultures and been successful.  Oh, to have the abandon of youth!

But here I am, at the age of 54, living my life a little backwards. It's my children giving me the advice, checking my luggage to make sure I have the right wardrobe, and most importantly, giving me the encouragement I need to not chicken out on this adventure.  It's my husband making sure I have the right credit cards and electronics for two months away from home, and insisting that I call home on a regular basis--daily he says! I'm pretty sure I have no idea what's ahead for me and I'm pretty sure there will be plenty more ego shattering moments, but like the past two years, this will also be good for me.

The french language as all languages do, has a set of it's own idiomatic phrases and ways of saying things.  One of the phrases I like is "Paris awaits....," fill in your pronoun.  "Paris awaits you, me, us, them..." I think it's such an elegant phrase, and when a real french speaker says it, it is even more beautiful.

So, here I go, Paris awaits me! Or as they say in France, "Paris m'attend!"